Saturday, June 12

Every Stripper...

Every stripper, before she was a stripper, was someone's little girl. ~Tim Dorsey

This quote really struck a nerve with me. It reminded me of a conversation I had about 15 years ago- with a pastor who was trying to explain to me why I didn't view God in the right way. He said, "You're thinking of God (the Father) the way you think of your own father." I looked at him quizzically, so he went on to further explain, "Your own father has never shown you the kind of unconditional love you desire. He's always made you feel as though you'll never be good enough. So you expect the same from God. Until you realize that one has nothing to do with the other, you'll never be able to fully accept God's love."


He was absolutely right. I did think of God as some meanie in the sky, always disappointed in me, denying His parentage, waiting for me to screw up so He could rub it in my face.

The relationship between a father and daughter is so delicate and complex. If properly nurtured, a dad can provide a solid foundation on which his little girl can walk from childhood into healthy and happy womanhood. Alternately, if not handled with care, that foundation can become a shifting pit of quicksand into which she sinks.

I'd love to round up every dad with a daughter(s) in the world, and implore them to please LOVE LOVE LOVE their little girls and their big girls. I'd tell fathers to let them know that the stars shine in their eyes, and that no matter what happens, dad's love will never waver.

Studies, and society in general has shown us what can happen when a girl has little to no positive interaction with her father. Frequently she'll seek approval relentlessly, and in the most negative places, from the multitudes of bottom dwellers that are more than happy to take advantage of an emotionally needy female.

In a 2002 study involving more than 1000 prostitutes, 81% reported having had either a bad, or no relationship with their fathers, and 59% of them reported growing up in a home where their father was not present.

Here are a few more father stats to consider:

•Girls with a healthy father-daughter relationship have higher self-esteem, are more likely to get along with people, and seek higher education.

•Girls with fathers who are actively involved in their life show higher English and math skills, as well as having a higher IQ.

•Girls with involved dads tend to be more determined, more successful in school, more self-nurturing, more independent, and are less likely to have abusive relationships.

•Dads that are loving tend to have daughters that are less likely to try drugs, and less likely to be truant or delinquent.

With numbers like these, why leave anything to chance when it comes to precious little girls?
Here's some excellent reading from Joe Kelly on the subject of Dads & Daughters:

Stat sources:
*Healing Hearts & Families 2008


Yenta Mary said...

Fathers are so, so important in our lives! That quote is so sad, and yet so true ....

Karen Mortensen said...

Thanks for this. Fathers are so important to us. I am grateful I had a good father.

Blackberry Cottage said...

What a wonderful post - thank you for sharing it. Just catching up from Follow Friday Over 40 - so glad you linked up!

I'm now following and loking forward to getting to know you better.


{Amanda} said...

Thank you so much for following my blog! I look forward to reading more about you!

Fathers really are so important! I sure love my Dad! ♥

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